


Dark Matter

by orphan_account



Category: Law & Order: SVU, The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Asexual Character, Concepts of Virginity, Demisexuality, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Fíli and Kíli Brotherly Love, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Medical Jargon, Rape Aftermath, Rape Recovery, Revenge, Romantic Friendship, Romantic love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-12
Updated: 2017-02-05
Packaged: 2018-08-08 09:25:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 17,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7752160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"When she didn't come home on time, they got worried."<br/>Tauriel goes missing and the boys are waiting for some clue what has happened to her, where she is.<br/>At dawn, she is returned to them in an awful state.<br/>Soon it becomes clear that someone from Fíli's and Kíli's past is behind this, seeking revenge.<br/>This fic is not related to the other fics I have posted so far.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Not Home

**Author's Note:**

> "I prefer to characterize rape simply as a form of torture. Like the torturer, the rapist is motivated by the urge to dominate, humiliate, and destroy his victim. Like a torturer, he does so by using the most intimate acts available to humans -- sexual ones."  
> Helen Benedict, Virgin or Vamp, 1992

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know where this came from, but it was very insistent that it wanted to be written.  
> Please let me know what you think!  
> Unbetaed.

When she didn't come home on time, they got worried.

It was a thirty minute walk from her school to the small house she shared with her fiancé, his brother, their cousin and her stepbrother.

And usually, when something out of the ordinary happened, she called or sent at least one of them a message.

But not today.

So, when she wasn't home at the time they expected her, Fíli first called her school, only reaching the headmaster, who confirmed that the last of staff had left the building fifteen minutes ago. And it hadn't been her.

So, Gimli and Legolas got onto Gimli's motorbike, searching for her because they knew the route she always walked, down the main street, through a small park, taking a short cut when crossing the parking space of a supermarket (sometimes she called Kíli then, asking if she should get something for dinner, which usually wasn't the case because Fíli had already covered that).

But there was no trace of her now.

In the meantime, Kíli was sitting next to the phone, his mobile in hand, waiting for a message from her or one of their friends and aquaintances because Fíli was calling everybody they knew, just to make sure if anybody had seen her, heard from her. But his efforts were in vain.

When it started to get dark, they called the police.

Of course, they were told that the police couldn't do anything because Tauriel was an adult who could do as she pleased (like turning her back on her family, fiancé, friends and her job to elope with her secret lover, as one of the officers suggested, though it earned him a scowl and shook of the head from his partner).

“She isn't like that,“ Kíli hissed, drawing his eyebrows together, while Fíli placed his hand on his baby brother's forearm, to calm him down. “My sister is very reliable,“ Legolas confirmed, sniffing. And, after revealing who his father was, they turned pale.

In the end, the officers took a picture of Tauriel with them. It was Kíli's favourite. Fíli took it during summer vacation at that secluded beach they had discovered per chance and it showed her without her her make-up on, wearing nothing but a green top and a blue bikini bottom, her hair down and wavy because it has air-dried after swimming, standing on the shoreline, waves playing around her bare feet, her red hair aflame in the sunset, a happy smile on her beautiful face. A picture that showed her the way she really was, carefree and vulnerable. A picture taken the day he had asked her to marry him.

The officers promised to make it an official missing person case if she didn't return until next morning.

 

But at dawn, she did.

It was Fíli who heard a car stopping in front of their house, doors opening and close, footsteps on the pavement, a thud. When he finally got out of bed (freeing himself from a sleeping Kíli he had been holding close all night, until the younger's sobs died down, passing out from exhaustion and worry), he looked outside through a crack in the blinds.

Something was lying at the foot of the steps leading up to their front door. At first he thought it was some kind of mannequin, a Halloween prep (the holiday was drawing near, so maybe some kids were playing a prank), but then he recognized her red hair, illuminated by the streetlight. His stomach dropped. Tauriel! It had to be her. He rushed down the stairs, opening the door, crouching down next to her lifeless, naked body. At first he thought she was dead, her body covered in blood and bruises, eyes closed.

He reached out a shaking hand, trying to check her pulse, letting out a breath he wasn't even aware of holding when he felt a weak heartbeat, bile rising in his throat when he noticed bite marks on her breasts, scratches across her belly, hand prints around her neck, the dried blood between her thighs. It didn't leave anything to the imagination about what had happened to her. Suddenly he felt uncontrollable anger and rage towards the monster who did this to her, the most wonderful woman in the world, his baby brother's wife-to-be.

He gathered her up in his arms, carrying her inside the house, lying her down on the couch in the living room, terrified about how cold she was (normally her body temperature was higher than his or his brother's, always a source for warmth on cold nights). But she was alive! He had felt the weak pulse of her carotid under his fingertips, her faint breath on his collarbone while carrying her.

Then he noticed that she was still naked, her body badly abused and oh so cold, so that he had the presence of mind to spread a blanket over her. Afterwards, he called an ambulance. While he was waiting for them to arrive, Kíli came down the stairs, rubbing his eyes sleepily, hair a mess. “Fíli? What are you doing down -” He stopped when his gaze fell on Tauriel's unconscious body, lying there on the couch while Fíli was kneeling next to her, holding her pale, cold hand in his. Kíli's face froze. “Is this her? Is this my Tauriel? Fíli, what -” he couldn't finish his sentence, sobbing heartbreakingly, collapsing on the stairs, burying his face in his hands. “Please, tell me she is not dead, please, Fíli!” he cried.

Fíli desperately wanted to go to him, to comfort him, but he didn't want to leave her side, as if him holding her hand was the only thing that kept her alive at the moment (and a strange, irrational part of him really believed that). Kíli's crying finally woke up Gimli who exited his and Legolas's bedroom. “What's going on? Is there any bad news?” He stopped dead in his tracks when his gaze fell on her. “How...? What...?” Gimli didn't finish his questions, swallowing, shaking his head. “Now I'm glad that Legolas combined those sleeping pills with booze, at least he doesn't have to see her like this, more dead than alive” he commented averting his gaze from her, stumbling over to Kíli, comforting his cousin in Fíli's stead.

When they saw the emergency lights in front of the house, Fíli sent Gimli outside, to guide the paramedics to them. Kíli was still crying, Tauriel was still unconscious. Fíli barely registered how the paramedics gently nudged him away from her, pulling the blanket off her body. Both men – young, athletic, good-looking – turned pale. Then they went about their business, checking her vital signs, hooking her on the IV. One of them rushed outside, getting a stretcher and a thermal blanket, putting the later over Tauriel's naked body before lifting her up and lying her down on the stretcher.

“This one is a fighter, she is surprisingly stable, considering her condition, but we need to get her to an ER as soon as possible”, one of them declared looking at Fíli. “If you want to, you can come with us and your girlfriend,” he said to Fíli while his colleague was already pushing the stretcher outside. Before Fíli could answer, like correcting him on his assumption, Kíli exclaimed, “She isn't his girlfriend, she is my fiancée!” The paramedic looked between them for a moment confused, then he shruggged. “Whatever, we'll take her to the ER now, come with us or follow us, your decision.” Saying that, he followed his colleague and Tauriel, while Fíli could hear Gimli whispering something to Kíli, finally locking eyes with his cousin. “Go. I'll take care of the rest. See you in hospital!” Fíli nodded, then he stumbled behind the paramedics, wearing nothing but sweat-pants, a t-shirt and socks, but no shoes, his phone in hand.

He couldn't really remember the drive to the hospital (of course he wasn't allowed to sit with her, so he took his place in the passenger seat of the ambulance, next to the driver, while the other paramedic was in the back, watching over Tauriel, helping her).

Then, they wouldn't allow him to come with her into the ER, instructing him to take his seat in the waiting area. Fíli supported his elbows on his knees, put his forehead in his hands, closed his eyes, trying to understand what had happened. That was when he registered the smell of blood and urine and semen on his hands, on his clothes, everywhere his body had come into contact with hers and he was really sick, jumping up from his seat, rushing to the public bathroom, throwing up. Afterwards he went over to one of the sinks, splashing cold water onto his face until he felt composed enough to go outside.

No sign of the others, though Fíli had texted his cousin at which hospital they were as soon as they arrived. He checked his phone. No messages. Suddenly, a female voice addressed him. “Mr Durinson?”

He looked up, surprised why a stranger would know his name. Then he remembered that he told them their names when he called the ambulance. “Yeah?” he said. But it wasn't a doctor or a nurse who just wanted to inform him about Tauriel's condition. It was a pretty blonde in a dark-blue suit and a white blouse, looking challenging at him. “Detective Amanda Rollins, SVU, may I talk to you for a moment?”

The acronym rang a bell... SVU... Special Victims Unit... the police unit who investigated crimes like sexual assaults. Now it was official what had happened to Tauriel.

Fíli nodded. “Sure,” he said, putting away his phone, letting himself being guided over to a quiet corner. “I'm so sorry about what has happened to your girlfriend,” she started and Fíli didn't have the energy to correct her. Why did everybody assume that Tauriel was his girlfriend? Instead he just mumbled a “Thank you” and let her continue.

“But we need to know all the details. Can you start from the beginning, please?” And he did while she was taking notes. “So, the victim isn't your girlfriend, but your brother's fiancée?” she asked as if to understand correctly. He nodded. “But you are living together?” Fíli nodded again, though it sounded strange, the way she said it. “Actually, her brother and our cousin are also living with us,” he added which caused her to frown at him. “So Ms Silvan is living together with four young men in one household?” she asked sharply and Fíli suddenly didn't like her attiude. As if they had done this to Tauriel... well, maybe that was what she assumed? He cleared his throat. “I'm sorry, am I in need of a lawyer?” he asked. Detective Rollins raised an eyebrow. “Do you think you are?” she asked back. Fíli felt frustrated. “No, of course not. I just found her like that... bloody... and bruised... and... and...” He couldn't continue, images of her broken body fresh on his mind.

“Raped? Tortured?”, Detective Rollins provided. It was too much for Fíli. He pressed his hand to his mouth, shaking and nodding his head at the same time, blinking away tears. They were interrupted by another woman clearing her throat. She was different from the blonde and fierce one, radiating warmth and sympathy. Somehow she reminded him of his mother. “We could collect enough evidence from her body, Amanda. Luckily she fought against her attacker! Now we can check the DNA samples,” she explained. Then she smiled at Fíli. “I'm Lieutenant Olivia Benson. She just came to and is asking for her fiancé. You can go to her!” Fíli simply nodded and swallowed. Again, he didn't have the energy to correct the lieutenant.

 


	2. Hospital

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tauriel is awake and Fíli talks to her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unbetaed.

When Fíli entered her room, she was already sitting up in bed. Luckily she wasn't naked anymore but wearing a hospital gown. However, the way her smile died down when she saw him, made his heart sink. “You are not Kíli,” she simply stated, lowering her gaze.

Fíli sighed. “No, just his stupid older brother!” It was supposed to be a joke, to make her laugh, but it didn't. She just frowned, pulling her knees up to her chest under the thermal blanket, hugging them. “They said my boyfriend accompanied me here and I corrected them, I said he was my fiancé and they said I could see him after... after the examination, but he isn't here. Why isn't he here? Where is Kíli?” Fíli wasn't prepared for this. Her IQ was above average (about 130, as she had admitted one night after drinking too much) and normally he and the other lads admired her wits.

“I'm sorry, Tauriel, maybe there was some misundertanding. It was me who accompanied you. Kíli is...” He paused. _Yeah, where is Kíli?_ he asked himself. But he didn't want to upset her more. “Kíli is on his way. He will certainly be here any minute. But you know how emotional he can get... I thought it wiser to leave him with Gimli and Legolas.” Of course he didn't mention Gimli's remark about Legolas combining booze with sleeping pills to her.

She nodded. “Yeah, how silly of me. We always have to look after him, you and I... Does he know what has happened to me?”, she suddenly asked, looking up, intense green eyes meeting his pale blue ones. “I don't know,” he said honestly. “It was me who found you, who understood what... what was done to you. I covered you with a blanket so that you would be decent if the others...” He was interrupted by her humourless laugh. It startled him. “Decent? Do you have any idea what was done to me? I have nothing left, everything was taken from me, my dignity, my pride, my engagement ring, my virginity...” She started crying. Fíli remembered. His brother had told him that he and Tauriel wanted to wait until their wedding night before having sex (although they had not exactly only been holding hands so far).

He felt overwhelmed. “Hey, it's okay, you are here now, you are safe,” he tried to reason with her. She nodded, wiping away her tears. “Safe, yeah, they gave me some medicine, like antibiotics, pain killers, morning-after pill, tranquilizers, so that I can feel safe, and after they understood who my stepfather was they even agreed on PEP – but safe? No, I don't feel safe!”

For Fíli this conversation was exhausting. He didn't know if it was due to her medication or due to her traumatic experience, but she wasn't making much sense, she wasn't like the Tauriel he knew, cool and composed. _Damn, Kíli, where are you?_ he thought.

Then she started crying again. “He said he would kill Kíli. He said he knew where we live and he would come and kill Kíli and he would kill you. He said this is payback. But I don't understand. Payback for what? What did you do?” she sobbed, looking accusingly at him. Fíli didn't have a clue. Instinctively, he went over to her to comfort her. But when he put his hand onto her shoulder, she shyed away from his touch. “Don't!” she hissed and he drew back his hand, feeling completely helpless and anxious. The bastard who did this to Tauriel wanted to take revenge on him and Kíli by raping his brother's fiancée and killing him and his brother? “Did you tell that to the police?” he asked.

Tauriel nodded. “Yes and they promised to sent some officers over to our house, saying we should immediately change locks because this... whoever did this to me has my keys.” Suddenly Fíli felt uneasy. What if the poilce officers were too late? What if the rapist already entered their home, making good on his promise to kill his brother?

They both winced when his phone rang. Checking the display he was relieved to see it was Kíli. “Yeah?” he asked. For a while, there was snuffling on the other end, then Kíli's voice. “They don't believe me! They won't let me go to her, they say her fiancé is already with her. Who is with her, then? Please tell them that I'm her fiancé, Fíli!” his brother whined. Fíli sighed. “It is just some misundertanding, I'll see what I can do!” He turned towards Tauriel to tell her that Kíli was here and he would go get him, only to notice that she had dozed off.

So silently he left the room and almost ran into a young and nervous looking police officer who was standing guard in front of the door while his older and more composed partner was trying to calm down an agitated Kíli. His brother beamed at him. “Fíli! Please tell them that I'm Tauriel's fiancé, that I would never do her any harm!” The officer turned towards him with a raised eyebrow. Fíli nodded. “Yes, he is.” Now the officer frowned. “But we were told... well, who are you then?” Fíli sighed. “I'm his brother, Fíli Durinson.”

The police officer gave a brief nod into his direction, then he let Kíli through, who immediately threw himself into Fíli's arms. “How is she? Did you talk to her? Does she have to stay here overnight?” he assailed his older brother with questions. Fíli gestured for him to be quiet then they enterd the room together. Tauriel was still sleeping and Fíli could see fresh tears rolling down his brother's cheeks.

They went over to her bed. Kíli was taking her hand into his, gently stroking the back with his thumb. Fíli simply stood next to his brother, his hand on the younger's shoulder. Suddenly they were interrupted by a young nurse who came to check Tauriel's IV infusion. Kíli's eyes widened when he recognized her. “Sigrid!” he exclaimed. It was his childhood sweetheart. She seemed to be as surprised as him. “Kíli! What are you... Oh, I'm sorry. You are her boyfriend?” Kíli sighed. “Fiancé, actually,” he corrected her. They fell silent for a moment. Then Sigrid went about her tasks, checking Tauriel's pulse, her blood pressure, her temperature.

Finally she turned towards the brothers. “I'm sorry, but I have to sent you outside while I wash her...” Kíli swallowed then nodded. With one last final glance at her, they exited the room.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Though there are some similarities to the AU in my other stories, this is a different AU.


	3. Investigation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Olivia and Amanda ask Tauriel about what has happened to her. Tauriel tells them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Although this chapter is about what has happened to Tauriel, no details about the actual rape are given.  
> Unbetaed.

In the afternoon, they were discussing the new case.

“What did you find out so far?” Fin ask, sipping his coffee while Carisi studied the pictures of Tauriel Silvan. Amanda shrugged. “Not much. According to her fiancé's brother she didn't come home from work in the afternoon, when they couldn't locate her, they called the police, were told that nothing could be done because there was no hint that a crime had taken place, that they should wait till morning. Then, at dawn, somebody dropped her naked and unconscious body in front of the house, he found her, called an ambulance, she was brought to the hospital, the hospital called us when they learned that the girl had been raped and beaten,” she informed her colleagues.

“Poor girl,” Carisi mumbled, putting the pictures down on the table.“Were you able to talk to her or was she unconscious the whole time?” he asked.

Olivia took her seat between Amanda and Fin, coffee cup in hand. “Actually she woke up after the doctors had stabilized her, in the middle of the sexual assault and forensic medical examination. At first she was in a panic, frantic, not really knowing where she was, what was going on, struggling. But when we calmed her down, she realized where she was and what had happened to her. She understood that it was important to get an examination and even agreed to photos being taken of her injuries. Yet, she was still in shock. She wasn't able to provide coherent information about the assault or the assailant. And of course the doctors didn't want her to become too upset in her fragile state. Therefore, Amanda and I will go back today.” Olivia took a sip from her coffee before she continued. “She was able too provide some crucial information, though: It seems that the rape was some kind of revenge.”

Fin looked up, very interested. “Revenge? For what?” he asked. Olivia shrugged. “She didn't know. She was only able to say that her fiancé and his brother were not safe at home, that the rapist had threatened to kill them, that he said she only got what she deserved for getting involved with scum like them.”

Fin and Carisi looked at each other. “Well, I think it could be interesting to interview the brothers as well. What do you say, Liv?” The lieutenant smiled at her detective. “Well, I say you are right. So let's start then. Amanda and I will go over to the hospital and you, Fin and Carisi, will go talk to...” She took a look at the file. “Fíli and Kíli Durinson.” She noted down their names and the address and handed over the slip of paper to Fin. Then all four left the precinct.

 

When Olivia and Amanda entered the hospital room, the girl was lying in a foetal position on the bed, no longer wearing a hospital gown, but a yellow t-shirt with a comic print on the front and black sweat pants, her hair no longer tousled and matted, but pulled together in a neat Dutch braid, her arms tightly wrapped around her middle, eyes staring into space.

“Ms Silvan?” Olivia asked and the girl responded, looking into her direction while sitting up, scowling for a moment, then smiling sadly at her. “I remember you. You were here with me, when... before...” She didn't finish. Her eyes appeared to be glazed over, her pupils dilated and Olivia assumed she was still on pain killers and tranquillizers. “Yes, I was here with you while the doctors examined you. You were such a brave girl through all of that! We were able to collect a lot of evidence, but we also need to know from you what happened. This is Detective Amanda Rollins, she will take some notes. Can you tell us what happened?”

The girl looked at her again and Olivia noticed for the first time how beautiful she was, despite her split and swollen lip, her black eye, the laceration on her right cheek. Lowering her ganz she nodded while taking a shaky breath.

And she did.

She recounted how she was abducted on her way home from school while crossing the parking space of the supermarket, just dialling her fiancé's number in order to ask him whether there was anything she could get them for dinner or movie night, suddenly she remembered being grabbed from behind, a hand firmly pressing onto her mouth, the barrel of a gun to the small of her back, threatened to be killed, thinking about ways to escape this situation, not being able to come up with any, agreeing to cooperate, then being shoved into a minivan. Her attacker knocked her unconscious then and she only came to later, when she was in some kind of basement or storehouse, she wasn't really sure, tied up, lying on the cold, concrete floor.

The assailant was with her then, taunting her, humiliating her, beating her, ranting about the Durinson family and how she had sealed her fate when getting involved with them. At some point he started unbuckling his belt, opening the buttons on his jeans, pulling them down together with his underpants, telling her that he would show her what it was like to be with a real man, not some filthy Durinson, and she knew what was about to happen to her.

“Do you need the details?” she asked, scowling. Olivia tried to smile reassuringly at her. “Everything you can remember is important.”

The girl nodded, then continued, telling them how her attacker had ripped off her clothes, hurting her, violating her. At some point Olivia could hear Amanda taking a loud breath, but she remained silent. Finally the girl rubbed her forehead, stating, “And that was it then. My first time.” Olivia frowned. “What do you mean by that?” she asked. The girl also frowned. “I had been a virgin.” Olivia didn't know. The medical report only mentioned severe internal bruising and tearing.

It was Amanda who cleared her throat. “Excuse me? Can you repeat that?” The girl was raising her chin, looking challenging at them. “Before the rape, I had been a virgin.” Olivia and Amanda exchanged a look. “Well, that's unusual nowadays. How old are you? Twenty-five? Most girls your age already have some sexual experience,” Amanda stated. The girl squared her shoulders. “Well, I'm not most girls. My fiancé and I wanted to wait until marriage. I wanted him to be my first. And now...now...” She started crying. Olivia pitied her. “Hey, it's okay. What happened to you is a heinous crime. It has nothing to do with what lovers share. You might need some time to heal, but you can still experience a first time with your fiancé,” she explained.

The girl looked doubtingly at her, but calmed down, wiping away her tears.” Then nodded. “You are probably right. If he still wants me, that is.” she admitted quietly. Olivia again smiled reassuringly at her. “Oh, I'm sure he does. Such an amazing girl, like you?” Tauriel still looked unsure. “I don't want him to ever know the details of the rape,” she gravely said while her fingers were playing nervously with the hem of her t-shirt.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Age references:  
> Tauriel is about twenty-five years old, as is Fíli. Kíli is five years younger than them.


	4. Earl Grey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kíli visits Tauriel in hospital. They talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this scene was long overdue.  
> Unbetaed.

When he entered the hospital room, he was glad to see her awake, sitting up in bed and watching TV, wearing the clothes he had picked out for her, not a hospital gown. Her face lit up like a Christmas tree. “Kíli!” she exclaimed. Then her expression darkened and she lowered her gaze, a scowl on her face, biting her already abused lip. “You were not here,” she whispered. Kíli's heart sank. “I know. And I'm sorry, but Fíli...” he started. She interrupted him. “Yeah, he was here, but he is not my fiancé. You are. And you weren't here.” She started crying silently, tears running down her cheeks. She wiped the tears away, not looking at him.

It pained him to see her like that, not only bruised and broken (her face was in an awful state, as were her arms and wrists, and Kíli felt lethal anger towards whoever had dared to blemish her beauty like that), but disappointed because he hadn't been there for her. She had always been there for him, helped him whenever necessary (he wouldn't be where he was now without her), but this one time, when she needed him, he had failed her.

“I'm sorry,” he whispered, tears burning in his own eyes. But he didn't want to cry in front of her. Instead, he approached her bed. “I brought you some more stuff,” he declared, offering her a bag and a tea-to-go. She didn't take it, just looking up at him, tears glistening like stars on her long lashes. Her behaviour unnerved him. “Something to change for tonight and for tomorrow as well as your cosmetics, your favourite book and this!” he elaborated, holding the tea in front of her face.

She reached out for the paper cup as if she was in a trance. _Maybe it's just the medication_ , Kíli thought. Then she put the cup to her lips. “Careful, it's hot! I just bought it in your favourite coffee shop, remember?” he tried to coax a reaction from her. This indifference hurt him more than her anger a couple of minutes ago.

Carefully she took a sip. “Earl Grey tea. My favourite! Yeah, I remember. Your brother used to work in that coffee shop. That's how we met,” she explained, smiling slightly, taking another sip before placing the paper cup on her nightstand. The whole time her gaze was on him, studying him, intriguing him. Then she reached for the bag. He handed it over to her, without touching.

Slowly she took item after item out of it, spreading the content on the bed, a pair of black leggings, an oversized blue t-shirt, two pair of socks, two panties, grey sweat pants and a green t-shirt, her toiletry case, a well-thumbed paperback. She frowned. “You forgot the bra again,” she simlply stated. Kíli frowned as well. “Did I? Well, maybe it's because I don't wear bras,” he tried to joke, but she just nodded. “Maybe. Why did you send Gimli first, anyway? Why didn't you bring the clothes yourself this morning when I needed them?” Again her intense gaze was on him.

Kíli swallowed hard. “It's complicated. There were things I had to deal with... but I packed your stuff for you. I wanted to come, I really did, but...” He stopped, not wanting to admit that he had been emotionally too unstable to face her, that he had feared his own distress would have upset her even more.

“You wanted to, but you didn't. I survived this only for you. He said he would kill you and my only thought was that I had to survive in order to warn you – and your brother. So I endured everything, the beating, the humiliation, the pain, hoping he would stop at some point and I could escape to run to you... And in the end you weren't there.”

She started crying again, this time burying her face in both hands, her shoulders shaking. Instinctively, he reached out his hand to comfort her, but stopped. Fíli had told him that she had shied away from his touch. “May I... may I... touch you?” he asked, his voice breaking.

Still sobbing, her face burried in her hands, she nodded. Tentatively, Kíli's fingertips came to rest on her shoulder. She flinched for a moment, but otherwise didn't protest. Feeling bold (and trying to make up for his failure) he slowly and carefully sat down on her bed, took her into his arms. She froze for a moment but allowed him to touch her like this.

They sat there for a while, clinging to each other, both crying. “I love you, Tauriel, more than anything else in the world, and I know that you deserve better than me, but it is what it is,” he rambled, kissing her hair, still smelling blood and sweat (and things he didn't want to think about), concluding that Sigrid might have washed her body, but not her hair.

“I know,” she answered, not elaborating whether she meant that she loved him too or that she knew that she deserved someone more suitable for her or that they couldn't change fate.

After taking a deep shaky breath she asked, “Do you know why this is my favourite novel? Why I have read it several times?”, referring to the old paperback he had brought. Kíli shook his head, then remembering that she couldn't see it, he answered, “No.” She entangled herself from him, looking into his eyes. “Because I wish that the story would change every time I read it, that Cathy would choose Heathcliff, not Edgar, that she would listen to her heart, to her soul, not to reason. If I were Cathy, I would have chosen Heathcliff!” she explained and there was something feral in her eyes.

Kíli couldn't hold back. Taking her face between his hands he kissed her. But she turned her face away, so that his lips only came into contact with her cheek. “Don't,” she whispered, “it's too early for that!” Kíli understood. “I'm sorry,” he mumbled. She smiled sadly. “Don't be. That's what you have to put up with from now on... damaged goods!”

It pained him to hear her talking about herself like that. “Never!” he exclaimed. “I will never see you like that. To me you are brave, you are strong... and if I hadn't already asked you to marry me, I would do so now!”

For some reason, that brought new tears to her eyes. “He took my engagement ring, Kíli. He said it was a nice trophy to have, after... after...” She couldn't finish her sentence, shaking violently with sobs and Kíli knew that it wasn't only about her engagement ring, but also about everything else that was taken from her.

“I'll buy you a new one,” he promised, wiping away her tears, noticing with relief that she didn't flinch from the touch. She nodded. “Unfortunately not everything else is so easy to replace...” she whispered. For some time they didn't talk, but were just looking at each other. Then he asked tentatively, “When can you come back home to us?”

Tauriel lowered her gaze, blushing. “I'm still bleeding... They... they want to make sure that I'm okay down there before they let me go home... By the way, can you bring me some pads next time you visit? You know which ones I prefer... I don't like those they give me here!”

He simply nodded. For her, he would do anything, even go buy sanitary pads in a drugstore.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, another rather short chapter (sorry).  
> There is some reference to a popular, classic novel in this chapter. Do you know which novel? Please let me know in the comments (I hope you also understand why I allude to the novel).  
> Of course, other comments are also appreciated!


	5. Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The detectives and their lieutenant talk about the case and find out something unexpected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is kind of an interlude.  
> Unbetaed.

The team met again in the evening, comparing notes, discussing what they have found out so far.

“That's an odd little group, not only the brothers, but also the other housemates,” Fin explained, sitting down. Amanda raised an eyebrow. “You tell me.” She took off her jacket, rolled up the sleeves of her blouse.

“Yeah, you talked to one of them, I know, by the way, he got the impression you suspected him and his... friends to have commited the crime when you were questioning him... Did we actually order pizza or Chinese food?” Carisi contributed. “Chinese. Should be here any minute. Well, it wasn't that far fetched. If you knew what I already had to face in this job...” Amanda answered, shrugging. “You know how situations can get out of control when alcohol and drugs are involved. Wouldn't have been the first time... A group of friends partying too hard, the guys get horny, the only available female is their flatmate or the girlfriend or sister of one of them, flirty banter leads to touching, the girl still feels safe – she has known them for years, after all – though she turns down the boys' advances, guys get angry, boozed up and drugged as they are, things get out of hand... Then they realize what they have done, try to cover up their deeds... or one of them regrets what has happened, calls an ambulance...” She didn't continue, but changed the subject. “Anyway, what did the brothers tell you?” she asked Fin and Carisi.

“Not much, actually. The older one repeated the same story he told you this morning and the younger one confirmed it. When we asked if they knew who was behind the attack – since the girl claimed it was revenge – they said they didn't have any idea,” Fin explained.

“Do you believe them?” Amanda wanted to know. Fin shrugged. “I'm not sure. Maybe this case is bigger than we thought.”

The food arrived and after they had sorted out who wanted to eat what, they all sat down around the table, eating.

When Carisi reached for Amanda's notepad with Tauriel's statement, she raised an eyebrow. “You really want to read that while eating?” Carsisi looked up surprised. “That bad?” Amanda snorted. “The worst kind. I even had to suppress my urge to run out of the room and throw up!” Carisi turned pale. Olivia studied the blonde detective for a moment. “You could have shown your sympathy towards the girl, instead of doubting her, Amanda,” she dryly commented. Amanda glared at her. “I didn't doubt her. I was just surprised she claimed to have been a virgin after giving a detailed account of what had been done to her. I mean, she didn't have any difficulties to name the specifics, that hit me as odd.”

Carisi cleared his throat. “Well being a virgin doesn't mean you don't know anything about sex. Nowadays it just means you didn't have sex, not that you are ignorant of how it's done.” Amanda just looked at him for a moment, then she provoked him. “Really? You are an expert or what?” Carisi clearly took offense, but before he could counter something, Olivia cleared her throat this time. “Anyway, this girl has been through hell, she was tortured, raped, humiliated, abused for hours and then left to die on her own doorstep – but her love for her fiancé kept her alive through all of this! Why would she lie about having been a virgin under these circumstances? Do you think she wanted to arouse pity? I don't want to see a reaction like that again in the future, Amanda. Is that understood? You have to learn to control yourself we need the victims to trust us, to cooperate!” Olivia scolded her detective.

The blonde woman fumed but nodded. “Yeah, I'll try to refrain from spontaneous reactions like that. Sorry!” They continued eating in silence for a while.

Then, Carisi asked, “What will we do next?” Olivia took a sip from her water. “First thing tomorrow, a sketch artist will go over to the hospital. The offender didn't wear a mask or blindfolded her and the victim clearly remembers his face. Then we will do some more investigation – Fin, Carisi, I want you to keep an eye on Fíli and Kíli Durinson. And finally we will have to wait for the DNA results. The victim was covered in several bodily fluids, skin cells and dried blood beneath her nails, so we got some good samples,” Olivia explained.

Carisi cleared his throat. “Sorry, did you just say offender, like singular form? Not offenders, like plural form?” Amanda rolled her eyes and Olivia frowned. “Yeah. Why?” Carisi looked uncomfortable at the others, thumbing through a forensic report. “Well, then we have a problem. The girl just remembers one rapist, fine. But they found three different types of sperm...” Amanda put the container with fried rice back on the table. “What? How can that be? Is she hiding something? Or do you think she might have forgotten due to the trauma? I'm not a psychologist, but maybe she ignored the other offenders after being brutally raped the first time?”

Olivia shook her head. “That's not good. Her image of the attacker could be a mixed up version of all three rapists. Yet, I will still send the sketch artist to her. And – as unpleasant as it is – we will have to collect DNA samples from her fiancé, his brother, their cousin and her stepbrother, if only to distiguish their DNA from the offenders'.” The others nodded.

Then Carisi let out a breath. “I guess I know why she couldn't remember the other rapists – the forensic report says she had been drugged at some point, hence the unconsciousness. Maybe the other two offenders violated her after she was drugged out? Honestly, guys, am I the only one who has read the report?” Amanda snorted. “You do realise that this detailed forensic report just came in when we got back here and you were the first one to snatch it before we could even look at it?”

Carisi lowered his gaze, handing the report over to her. “Oh,” was all that he said.

 


	6. Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fíli contemplates everything that has happened. Then he remembers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unbetaed.

At dusk, Fíli sat on the front steps of their home, cigarette in hand, a bottle of beer next to him. Actually he had quit smoking a couple of months ago (one of his New Year's Eve resolutions), but after everything that had happened, he really needed it. He could see the police car passing their house every couple of minutes, driving in circles. Fíli was grateful for the police's concern. They had changed the locks, but still...

Then, however, Fíli couldn't understand how this small parcel could have been delivered to them. It was lying on their doorstep when he came home after visiting his mother and uncle. He had to tell them what had happened to Tauriel after scaring them to death when he had called them yesterday (was it only yesterday?), asking if they had heard from her then. Sipping his beer and dragging on his cigarette, he remembered his mother's reaction this afternoon. He and his uncle were sitting at the kitchen table, whereas his mother was preparing something to drink. Then he told them how he had found Tauriel, what had happened to her, what message this was supposed to be.

His mother, still standing next to the fridge, had turned very pale, the glass of water she had wanted to hand him slipping through her shaking fingers, pressing both hands to her mouth. His uncle, scowling, just slammed his fist down on the table. “This is personal! This bastard violated and threatened members of my family!” he growled, then gritted his teeth. Since Kíli's engagement with Tauriel, his uncle considered her family, instead of just tolerating her, like before.

“The poor girl, the poor, poor girl,” Dís mumbled, walking over to her chair on shaky legs, not caring for the mess on the floor, sitting down. His mother had always liked Tauriel, especially since she had saved Kíli's life, when he was suffering from aplastic anaemia two years ago, by being his allogeneic HSC donor when neither close nor extended family members had matching tissue types. She was no registered bone marrow donor, barely friends with him or his brother, just a regular customer in the coffee shop where he used to work (and where Kíli used to sit and wait for him), but when she learned about Kíli's illness, she immediately volunteered to get tested. 

Nobody thought that anything would come from it, but they appreciated the gesture. Yet, surprisingly, her tissue type matched Kíli's. And she became his donor. Then, after the transplantation, a part of her body was a part of Kíli's, her DNA embedded in his. Maybe that was the reason they fell so hard for each other (though Fíli suspected that Kíli already had a crush on her before the transplantation while Tauriel also seemed to be quite fond of him – why else would she have agreed to help him).

Fíli's gaze fell on the fainted stains at the foot of the stairs. After coming home from the hospital and calling his cousin Nori, a locksmith, he immediately started to clean away the blood stains – her blood stains – while Kíli tried the same with their couch. Well, both of them hadn't been very successful. The stains were no longer as prominent as before, but neither the concrete at the foot of the steps, nor the fabric of their couch cover was unblemished.

He remembered how Kíli had cried the whole time while dipping the cleaning rag into soapy water, wringing it out, then rubbing at the dried blood stains. At that time, Legolas had visited with his parents, telling them what had happened to Tauriel – and Fíli was not envying him – while Gimli brought Tauriel some fresh clothes. Afterwards he wanted to run some errands, then join Legolas at his parents', before they would both go over to the hospital, visiting Tauriel (this would be the first time Legolas faced his stepsister after the rape) and bringing Kíli back home (he didn't have his own car anymore because he hald sold it in order to buy Tauriel's engagement ring, the one the rapist took fom her).

However, the lads should all be back home soon. Fíli contemplated telling the others about the parcel. It was anonymous, only his and his brother's names on it and their address. Yet he doubted that it was delivered by a delivery service.

Maybe the best thing was to hand it over to the police. But a part of Fíli agreed with his uncle: This was personal. He knew what Thorin meant by that: The Durinson-Clan would deal with that bastard in their own way. It wouldn't be the first time. 

Fíli had told Nori what had happened and he was sure that Thorin did the same with Dwalin. So, the best idea would be to bring the parcel to Thorin and call their clan members together. Yet, Kíli and Gimli were also clan members. And wasn't Legolas, due to his invovement with Gimli and his relation to Tauriel, also part of the clan? 

Fíli finished his beer and his cigarette, then he went inside. The parcel was still sitting on the elegant coffee table Tauriel and Legolas had picked out from their father's design collection. He hadn't opened the parcel yet. Should he wait for the others to arrive? Should he open it first? If it contained something bad, did he want Kíli and Legolas to see it?

So, taking a deep breath he slowly approached the coffee table, reaching out his hands, then his fingers touched the wrapping paper. He knelt down in front of the coffee table and with shaking hands he removed the paper, then he opened the carton. At first he noticed the smell of blood and urine and semen. Then he realised that the parcel contained a woman's underwear, a torn bra and torn panties, smeared with blood and who knows what else. He wasn't sure, but his first guess was that it had to be Tauriel's underwear.

For a moment, he hesitated to touch the lingerie, but then he remembered how he had even touched Tauriel's naked body when he had carried her inside, so, taking a deep breath, he grabbed the remains of the light blue lace slip and what was left of her yellow push-up bra. And, to his surprise, the parcel contained more than just his sister-in-law-to-be's underwear. It also contained a letter, a brown teddy bear and a blue toy car. 

Fíli remembered. The teddy bear had been Kíli's, the toy car his when they were children. He remembered. The last presents of their late father. Fíli had gotten this car for his fifth birthday whereas their father had bought the teddy bear for Kíli before he had been born... Fíli could barely remember him, the father who had died when he was only five and when Kíli had still been in their mother's womb, a very gentle and cheerful man, completely different from his uncles (well, maybe not Uncle Frerin, he had also been cheerful, but rather reckless than gentle) .

Fíli remembered everything now. 

Their mother's grief after she had learned that her husband had died in the line of duty (he had been a police officer) which induced her going into labour (too early), Kílis birth. Yes, Kíli had been born prematurely because the news of their father's death had caused their mother to go into labour.

Their mother had mourned her husband for quite a while, but then she met someone else. After several months of dating they moved in with him and his son.

That was when things got worse.

Fíli remembered the beatings, his mother's tears, Kíli's cries. Two or three times, she ended up in hospital. 

He only once.

But this was enough for his mother to find her courage and leave this asshole. They moved in with their uncles (Frerin had still been alive then).

Fíli remembered now.

He needed to call Thorin.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope it becomes clear now what has happened in Fíli's and Kílis past.  
> I know, it's all vague. Any ideas why someone might want to take revenge on them?  
> Please let me know in the comments (and, as always, other comments are also very much appreciated).  
> Furthermore, I think this chapter sheds a light on Kíli's and Tauriel's relationship.


	7. Parents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Legolas tells his parents what has happened to Tauriel. They don't take it well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unbetaed.

When Legolas rang the bell at his parents' estate, it was with a wildly beating heart.

Of course they knew that Tauriel went missing the day before and in the meantime he had received uncountable messages from them, inquiring if there were any news, but he wasn't able to answer them (unfortunately, it hadn't been a good idea to wash down the sleeping pill with vodka, he was knocked out cold until morning, not even noticing Kíli's breakdown or the ambulance arriving, Gimli had to drag him into the shower, turning on the cold water, so that he could accompany him and Kíli to the hospital, but Tauriel had been asleep then).

It was his stepmother who opened the door (of course, after first checking who it was), only wearing a pristine white silk bathrobe, her eyes red-rimmed and swollen, her long, blond, wavy hair dishevelled. “Legolas! What happened? Has she come home?” she asked with her strange accent, looking at him intensely.

Legolas swallowed. “Well, yes, you could call it like that, erm, where is my father?” He didn't want to tell her on his own. “I'm here!” his father's voice answered from somewhere behind the door. “Can I come in then?” Legolas asked. And his stepmother nodded, opening the door completely, letting him into his former childhood home. His father was sitting at the large, solid wood dining room table in off-white, also wearing a bathrobe, but a dark silver one, his light blond hair unkempt, a bottle of Gin in front of him and a half full glass.

The room smelled of alcohol and sex and sweat. Legolas could imagine what his parents had been doing the last couple of hours – drinking and fighting and fucking. That was their way of dealing with problems, anger or grief (and Legolas briefly remembered an incident from his childhood, when he and Tauriel had walked in on them while having rough sex after a huge fight - Tauriel swore that this was the reason why she has remained a virgin and he became gay).

His stepmother went over to the table, grabbing the bottle of gin, taking a big swig directly from it. His father didn't seem to care. “Well?” he simply said, looking expectantly at Legolas, his eyes as red-rimmed and swollen as his wife's.

Legolas swallowed again, gesturing towards the dining room table. “May I have a seat first?” And when his father nodded, rubbing his eyes, Legolas turned towards his stepmother. “Maybe you should also sit down.” She simply nodded following his advice. Legolas took his seat at the table, looking at his father and stepmother, clearing his throat. “She was brought back home last night. But she was in an awful state...” He had to stop at this point, taking a few deep breaths, swallowing back tears and before he continued, he could see his father reaching for his stepmother's hand. After a moment of hesitation, she took it.

Legolas continued. Although he hadn't seen Tauriel's badly abused body, Fíli's descriptions had been very detailed. Nevertheless, he needed to tell his parents what had happened. “She... had been beaten... and tortured and... raped. She's in hospital now and the police is investigating.” He could see his father closing his eyes, pressing a hand to his mouth. His stepmother, however, reacted worse. She burried her face in one of her hands, making sounds like a wounded animal. “No!”, she cried, “No, no, no!” It broke Legolas's heart. Although she wasn't his biological mother (he had been six months old when his father had met her and brought her home, she being already three months pregnant with Tauriel then), but she was the only mother he knew.

“I'm sorry, Mum,” he whispered, crying himself now, admitting to them what Fíli had guiltily revealed to him and Gimli and Kíli about the background of the attack.

“Who would do something like that? She is just an innocent girl. Why?” his stepmother sobbed. Legolas didn't know. “When... when you said yesterday that she didn't come home, I thought that maybe this was about money, that somebody kidnapped her in order get money from us, but since you didn't mention a ransom demand... I thought... I thought the worst. That she was dead, killed by some pervert. At least she is alive...”, his father slowly said. This seemed to make his stepmother furious. “At least alive? You have no idea what it's like for a woman to... to experience something like that!” She snatched her hand away from his, jumping up from her chair, pacing, breathing hard. Legolas hoped that his father would try to calm her down, to comfort her. But he just remained sitting, staring at the glass in front of him, then automatically reaching out a hand towards it, emptying it in one draught. Afterwards, he refilled the glass.

Legolas wished he had accompanied Gimli to the hospital, to visit Tauriel and bring her fresh clothes first, so that they could then face his parents together. But a part of him was afraid to see his sister so soon after the rape (quite frankly, a part of him had been relieved this morning when she had been asleep as he arrived at the hospital). He had known her since her birth (although being only one year old then, he couldn't really remember their first encounter), they had grown up together, were always very close (well not recently, Kíli seemed to hog her and her attention completely and it got even worse after the engagement).

Legolas was simply afraid of how he would react upon seeing her injuries (according to Gimli, Fíli and Kíli she really looked bad). For him she was still the little girl with wild red hair and chafed knees, riding her bike and climbing trees with him and his friends. To imagine that someone had dared to hurt her the worst possible way, made him sick to his stomach.

Legolas wrenched the glass away from his father's fingers, downing the alcohol. It burned and didn't really make him feel better, but started to dull his senses (especially since his last meal had been lunch the day before).

His father studied him for a moment (while his stepmother was still pacing the floor, crying and rambling angrily in a foreign language), then he said calmly, “I told her it was a bad idea to leave home and move in with this kid and his brother, that it was a bad idea to get involved with the Durinsons at all. And I told you that you should keep an eye on her and on the Durinson brothers. But what did you do? You started spreading your legs for their cousin instead, claiming it's love!”

Legolas drew his eyebrows together. He understood that his father was angry and hurting about what had happened to his stepdaughter (being there during almost every step of the pregnancy and later her birth, she was really like a daughter to him, he had even adopted her since her real father had officially been unknown). But Legolas felt it was unfair that his father directed his anger towards him. “You might not understand it, but I love Gimli. And he loves me. And I know that Tauriel and Kíli love each other as well. We are all adults and perfectly capable of making our own decisions – like it or not. What do you want, anyway? That Tauriel and I would forever live with you? That we would forever remain your little boy and little girl?”

His father's furious gaze met his for a moment – sky-blue eyes staring into sky-blue eyes. He looked a lot like his father and even shared some of his character traits, although not all. Finally, it was his father who averted his gaze. “Sorry, son, it's just... it's too much to deal with.” They fell silent. Suddenly his stepmother came over to the table, slamming both hands down onto the surface, making him and his father wince. “I want to see her. She is my little girl and she needs me now!” There was something feral in her eyes (Legolas knew the expression, Tauriel got the same one when she was passionate about something). 

Legolas nodded. “Well, Gimli will come over later, to fetch me and take me to the hospital. You can come with us then.” His stepmother seemed to contemplate his answer. Then she shook her head. “No, I want to see her now! Where are my car keys?” Saying that, she went over to the key rack, next to the entrance door, looking for her keys. 

His father jumped up from his chair, rushing over to her, grabbing her. “No! You are in no state to drive!” he firmly said. She struggled against him, trying to free herself from him, physically and verbally abusing him, but he was stronger than her, kept holding her, though she was obviously hurting him, until she seemed to calm down, sobbing again. “She's my baby... I need to go to her...” she repeated like a mantra, finally no longer struggling against her husband's embrace but rather clinging to him while he was still holding her close, kissing her hair, whispering comforting words. 

Legolas couldn't understand what his father was saying to her, but she nodded finally and let herself being guided over to the ridiculously large and expensive coffee brown leather couch. The whole scene broke Legolas's heart, new tears running down his cheeks. 

“Legolas?” his father called him. Legolas wiped away his tears. “Yeah, Daddy?” He hadn't called his father like that since he had been twelve (always dad or even father, when he was angry) and he could see love and nostalgia in his father's eyes due to the familiar form. “Your mother and I – we had a rough night. Of course, we will accompany you and your... boyfriend to the hospital, but I think we need to make ourselves more presentable first. And we need to sober up. Can you make us some coffee and breakfast, while your mother and I take a shower and get properly dressed?” 

Legolas nodded. “Yeah, sure!” he said. And although he wasn't really hungry, breakfast sounded nice, even if it was already noon. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since I avoided using names for Legolas's father and stepmother, can you guess who they are?  
> I think his father is easy to identify, but what about his stepmother?  
> Please let me know in the comments. Of course you can also comment on anything else.


	8. Like Mother, Like Daughter?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tauriel has some visitors at the hospital and a dark secret from her mother's past is revealed to her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unbetaed.

It was difficult for Tauriel to allow anybody to touch her after what had happened, but somehow, to her own surprise, she could stand Kíli's closeness, allowing him to settle down with her in the hospital bed.

So, she was resting her head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat, which was anchoring her to this world, inhaling his familiar scent, like leather and licorice, which helped her to remain sane, while he was reading her favourite novel to her, still making some mistakes, but of course he was much, much better than three years ago when she had met him for the first time in the coffee shop.

He had been honest with her right from the start. “I'm bad at reading and writing, I'm bad at calculating, so, yes, mama had to send me to a school for kids with special needs... but anyway, I can still wash out the tea stain for you if you take off your shirt!”

Yes, that was how they had met, she carrying a cup of hot Earl Grey tea while walking over to an unoccupied table, her gaze focused on the novel she had to read for her English course (that being “Wuthering Heights”), he walking over to the counter in order to bother his older brother, eyes glued to a comic book (and later he would admit that he had simply wanted to ask his brother what a certain word meant).

Then, they collided, causing her to spill the tea onto her cream-coloured, sleeveless blouse. What was worse, it was lunch break, meaning that she would have to wear the blemished item during her afternoon classes.

Of course, he had been sorry, of course, he had apologized to her, but she was really furious, asking him if he was stupid or something. Later, after his (admittingly badly formulated) confession, she felt awful. Nevertheless, she understood that he had also tried to hit on her with that statement and she shot back. “Sorry, but this is silk – so I don't think you know how to handle this!” She was twenty-two then and could tell that he was much younger, probably not even of age (and, as it turned out later, she had been right).

Nevertheless, the kid showed up every day at the coffee shop, either pestering his older brother working there or her catching up on her reading while enjoying her tea and a sandwich for lunch.

“You read a lot, I see,” he would call over to her, which would cause her to look up with a scowl. Then he would smile at her. “I admire that! Reading is very tiring for me, so I rather watch TV – or let people read to me!”

That caught her interest, and upon her inquiring, he told her that he was dyslexic and had also been diagnosed with dyscalculia.

Being an ambitious young woman who studied to become a teacher, she tried to teach him reading and writing, bringing her favourite books with her every day, reading passages to him, reading them with him together, listening to him reading them to her and correcting him if necessary. He made progress, and soon not only his reading skills improved, but also his writing skills because she made him copy down whole passages from the books, teaching him techniques to memorize how the words were written correctly. Later she would make him write short summaries of the books they read, correcting his mistakes, explaining to him what was wrong and how the word had to be written correctly.

That was why he knew all about her favourite novels (especially her most favourite one, which also happened to be the one they read together first: “Wuthering Heights”), and she all about his favourite books and stories (like “The Brothers Lionheart” and “The Steadfast Tin Soldier”), either read to him by his brother, or his mother, or one of his uncles.

Then she told him that they would work on his calculating the following week.

But he never showed up.

After three days without any trace of Kíli, she asked his brother about his whereabouts. Fíli looked bad, pale and worried, dark circles beneath his eyes, and he admitted to her that his little brother was in hospital, due to aplastic anaemia, that he had been ill for some time, but suddenly, the medication wouldn't work and he was in dire need of an Hematopoietic stem cell transplantation, but so far they hadn't found a matched marrow donor.

To Tauriel, this came as a shock – she really liked the kid and was proud of the progression he had made concerning his problems with reading and writing. So she immediately promised to get tested. And her tissue type matched. And she became his donor.

Later, after recovery, they fell in love with each other and she encouraged him to attend evening classes, finish his secondary education, get a certficate so that he had better chances to find a job, maybe even go to community college. And he did.

Now, however, she felt that the power balance in their relationship had changed. Before it was more or less her taking care of him, now, after some initial difficulties, he seemed to understand that there were times when he had to take care of her as well.

She could feel her eyelids grow heavy, but she was fighting sleep. She wanted to listen to his deep, husky voice reading to her while he held her close. For some reason, it was the first time since her abduction, the abuse, the rape, the torture, that she felt safe.

She suspected she had really dozed off at some point because she winced when the door was suddenly opened and she could feel Kíli's arm tightening around her shoulders. “You startled her!” he scolded the intruder.

Opening her eyes, she could see that it wasn't only one intruder, but several of them, her parents, her brother, her brother's boyfriend.

Somehow she wished it would only be her and Kíli again. She didn't want to face them all now (especially since they all seemed to know what had happened to her). Nevertheless, she entangled herself from Kíli, sitting up.

She could see her mother pressing both hands to her mouth, coming slowly over to the bed. “Oh, baby, I'm so, so sorry!” she whispered. That was enough to reduce Tauriel to tears.

And in an instant, her mother was at her side, embracing her, holding her close.

She didn't know how long she stayed in her mother's arms, inhaling her comforting scent like orange blossoms and moss, but somehow Tauriel could almost persuade herself that everything was alright, that she was still a little girl and everything else just a bad dream.

But then, her mother mumbled, “I totally understand what has happened to you... I went through the same... but at least something good came out of it... you!”

Tauriel felt her stomach clench. “What?” she asked sharply. Of course, she knew that Thranduil wasn't her biological father. But she had always suspected a tragic love story behind her mother becoming pregnant with her when she was only twenty-one... Not something like that. She didn't want to be the result of such a violent act!

Her mother seemed to notice that she tried to escape her embrace, thus only holding her closer. “Shh, it's okay, I couldn't tell you before. I didn't want to upset you... But now it might be possible that you will have to face a similar situation and I want you to know that I will support you, whatever decision you will make!”

Tauriel understood. Her mother thought that it was possible for her to have become pregnant due to the rape. But she had been given the morning after pill... Of course she knew that it was still possible for her to become (or rather be) pregnant. How would she decide?

Of course, she wanted to have children, maybe not now, but at some point in her life. And since she had started her relationship with Kíli she had always envisioned him to be the father of her children, not some... rapist. But the child would also be a part of her... and if her mother had decided to have an abortion, she wouldn't be here now... 

But could she endure to look at her child everyday and see her tormenter reflected back at her? Could she ask this of Kíli, to raise a child that wasn't his but his love's rapist's?

“I'm sorry, Mummy,” she whispered back and meaning it. “Don't be,” her mother finally said, taking her face between both hands, looking into her eyes (and Tauriel wondered whether she had inherited her hair and eye colour from her mother's rapist since her mother was blond-haired and blue-eyed), then kissing her forehead.

“Oh, Tauriel,” her stepfather whispered, also coming over to the bed, putting his hand on her shoulder, slightly squeezing. Legolas remained standing on the threshold, not saying anything, just looking at her with tears in his eyes while his boyfriend seemed to support him, his hand on the small of Legolas's back. Gimli didn't say anything as well. It wasn't necessary. They had already interacted a couple of hours before, when neither her fiancé nor her stepbrother had had the guts to face her!

“I-I think I'm sick!” Tauriel gasped, entangling herself from her mother's embrace, jumping up from the bed, heading for the bathroom.

And while she was retching and getting rid of what little she had eaten (only some tea and toast), she could feel her parents' eyes on her and hear the boys quietly talking in the background. When she stumbled over to the washbasin to rinse out her mouth, after flushing the toilet, everything went black.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you know the book "The Brothers Lionheart" by Astrid Lindgren and the fairly tale "The Steadfast Tin Soldier" by Hans Christian Andersen. Any ideas why they are Kíli's favourite stories? Any ideas how they relate to the plot of this fic?  
> Please let me know in the comments. Any other comment is also very much appreciated!


	9. A Long Overdue Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tauriel and her mother talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to thank my beta, GrammarGrrrl.

When Tauriel regained consciousness, she was lying in her hospital bed again. Upon opening her eyes, she could see that she was alone with her mother. Her stepfather and the boys must have left while she was unconscious.

“Mummy?” she asked.

Her mother, sitting on a plastic chair next to her bed, smiled at her. “I'm here, baby. I won't leave you.”

Tauriel tried to sit up. Her mother was instantly helping her by adjusting the pillows so that they would support her back. Tauriel noticed that she was hooked to the IV again.

“What happened?” she wanted to know.

Her mother stroked her hair, “You fainted.” She explained, “The nurse said it had to do with dehydration and hypothermia and everything else you went through.”

Tauriel nodded, memories of what had happened to her, and what had been disclosed to her before she fainted, coming back to her. She felt tears burning in her eyes.

“How can you love me, Mummy, after what has happened to you? How can Thranduil?” she asked quietly, looking straight into her mother's sapphire eyes.

Her mother stood up from the chair and settled down next to her, stroking her hair. “It wasn't easy at first. Believe me, when I found out that I was pregnant, I wanted to have an abortion. But then, when I went to the doctor and she did an ultrasound, I saw you for the first time and your heart was already beating! I couldn't do it then. I immediately knew that I wanted to have you. And you know that I met Thranduil when I was already pregnant with you. I never told him about the way you were conceived,” she explained, now crying herself.

Tauriel nodded. “So he doesn't know that you were raped,” she concluded.

“No, and I don't want him to know. That's why I sent him away with the boys, so we can talk openly,” her mother stated.

Tauriel nodded again, although she didn't really want to talk about it with her mother. What she had been through, it was so disgusting and humiliating and painful. She would rather forget about it, imagining it was just a bad dream. But she knew it wasn't healthy to suppress those memories. And somehow her mother managed to live a normal life afterwards, even started a relationship so soon after the rape.

She knew the story of how her parents had met. Thranduil had been a young and famous male model, recently widowed and father of a baby boy, who was only six months old then. The story was considered a tragedy, especially since his late wife (who had also been a successful model before her pregnancy) had committed suicide (by swallowing too many sleeping pills and drinking too much alcohol) three months after giving birth due to postpartum depression.

Her mother, however, had been an aspiring young actress at that time. It was December and both she and Thranduil were part of some charity Christmas TV show. They met, were attracted to each other and he took her home with him that same night. She never left after that.

Thranduil knew that she was already pregnant, but never asked about the baby's father, and, of course, she knew everything about his tragic background story due to excessive press coverage. They got engaged shortly before Tauriel's birth and married when Tauriel was one-year-old and Legolas two.

“How could you do that, Mum, afterwards I mean, starting a relationship, getting married...”, she asked quietly.

Her mother smiled sadly at her. “I had to, baby. For me, this was the only way to get my life back. I didn't want... him... to win, to destroy me,” she explained. Tauriel nodded again. That sounded plausible. Yet, she still imagined it must have been difficult for her mother to have sex with a man after the rape. For a moment she hesitated, then she felt bold enough to ask her mother about that.

The older woman swallowed, then she drew her eyebrows together. “It was, of course. But Thranduil was also hurting from losing his first wife. He was only nineteen then and for some reason I felt safe with him. Maybe it was because he introduced me to his son, Legolas. He was a loving father, after all, and as I saw him interacting with the baby, I thought that he would treat me well. And he did. Of course, I hadn't been a virgin before the rape, so I knew that sex normally wasn't a degrading and brutal act,” she revealed honestly.

Tauriel nodded again. Although she had been a virgin before her rape, she knew that sex wasn't supposed to be like that. She might have been inexperienced, but she wasn't ignorant. Yet she felt she wouldn't be ready to even try it for a very long time, despite the fact that Kili would surely be gentle and she had been able to stand him holding her this afternoon. But being embraced by someone was completely different from letting someone touch you intimately.

She told that to her mother and added, “You don't know what that monster did to me!” shuddering with disgust, lowering her gaze in shame.

Her mother took her into her arms. “You are right. I don't know, though I can imagine what has happened by just looking at your injuries. It wasn't only rape – that bastard tormented you as well, physically and psychologically.”

Suddenly she held Tauriel at arm’s length to look into her eyes. “And I promise you this: If I ever find out who he is and get a hold of him, he will suffer for what he did to my only daughter. I swear by my life!”

Tauriel knew that her mother meant it. She had come to this country all alone when she had only been twenty, leaving behind her younger sister (who would soon after follow in her footsteps, become an actress, move to this country, marry a successful writer), her parents and her boyfriend to pursue her career. Her mother was tough and strong, in body and mind.

Tauriel hoped that she had inherited this strength from her so that she could resume her normal life after everything that had happened.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can imagine that this is the first of several heart to heart talks between mother and daughter.  
> Comments are very much appreciated!


	10. The Devil Is in the Details

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thorin gets a disgusting video and Fíli tells him who he thinks is behind the brutal attack on Tauriel. Thorin already knows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, I'd like to thank my wonderful beta, GrammarGrrrl.  
> Furthermore, I'd like to thank all my readers for being interested in this story!

With shaking hands, Thorin stopped the video. He felt sick. That bastard who had violated his favourite nephew's fiancée had really sent him footage of the rape. And not only him, but all of their family members, as the header revealed. Luckily, Thorin knew his sister's password, so he quickly checked her email account and deleted the bastard's message. But he didn't know Fili's and Kili’s passwords. Hopefully, they hadn't already checked their emails. The lads definitely didn't need to see those gruesome pictures.

When the telephone rang, Thorin winced. “Hello?” he asked, half expecting his archenemy's son would be on the other end.

However, it was his oldest nephew; Thorin would always recognize his voice.

“Thorin?” he asked, sounding terribly young and desperate.

“Yeah, Fili, what's up?” he said breathlessly.

He could hear that Fili was taking several deep breaths, then he declared, “I know who did this to Tauriel, Thorin, that... that sick fuck has sent me... us a parcel with her... her ripped underwear. And some things from Kili's and my childhood!”

Thorin closed his eyes. For a moment he had thought that maybe Fili had watched the video, but obviously he hadn't. Good.

“I know, Fili, I know. That bastard sent me and other members of our family a video... Please, don't watch it! And I need you to immediately delete it from your brother's account!” Thorin explained.

Fili gasped, then he wanted to know, “Why, Thorin? What does the video show?”

Thorin closed his eyes and swallowed hard. He knew how close Fili and Kili were, he knew about the brothers' unusual bond, about the deep affection between Kili and his fiancée, the pure love they shared, about the special friendship between Fili and Tauriel.

“The video shows how your brother's fiancée was raped and tortured in the most disgusting ways by Azog Butcher's son!”

They fell silent.

“What do we do, Thorin?” Fili finally asked.

The older man sighed.

“We take revenge, like all those years ago, when Azog hurt you, your brother and your mother. I already informed Dwalin and Dain about what had happened to your brother's fiancée and we agreed to call a meeting for tonight so that our clan can talk about it,” he explained.

“What about the police, Thorin? Do we need to inform them about the parcel and the videos?” Fili inquired.

Thorin sighed again.

“They would want to know, wouldn't they? But I'm convinced that they won't be able to help us. Let them do their job and be as cooperative as you need to be, so that they can't accuse you of interfering with their investigations – we don't want to raise suspicions,” he declared.

That was what he and their clan had done after dealing properly with that bastard, Azog. A part of him regretted that they hadn't dealt with this scum's son as well, especially after Fili had uttered his suspicions about what Bolg had been doing to Kili... But Bolg had only been fifteen by then and nobody wanted to hurt an adolescent. Thorin even tried to convince himself that Fili must have misinterpreted the situation then, he had only been ten years old, after all, too young to explicitly say what he thought Bolg was doing to his baby brother.

“ _Bolg is hurting Kili, Uncle! I came home earlier from school today and Kili was naked and crying and when I wanted to go to Kili to comfort him, Bolg hit me. Please make him stop hurting Kili, Uncle!”_

Thorin, however, had refused to believe it. He couldn't believe it. His sweet, innocent nephew being violated like that? No, there must have been some confusion on Fili’s part. Maybe Bolg had to change Kili’s clothes after the child had wetted himself. For some reason, Kili had started to wet himself again at the age of five and Azog had punished him regularly for it as Thorin found out later. Maybe Bolg had treated the boy like his father did, had punished Kili and also let out his anger on Fili when he had shown up.

Now, however, after Thorin had learned what Bolg was really capable of doing (the video was proof to this), he thought that maybe Fili had been right and he had just been too ignorant.

Thorin knew that he had to put things right. Whether Fili liked it or not.

“Whatever you say, Uncle,” Fili just commented and Thorin could tell that his older nephew didn't like to walk the line between what was legal and what was not.

Then Fili added, “What about Kili and Gimli? Shall I inform them about the meeting?”

Thorin closed his eyes and thought about it for a moment.

“Leave them out of it – they're too young. And don't inform Ori either – he wouldn't understand.”

Thorin hated to exclude clan-members from important meetings and, thus, decisions, but he felt that those aforementioned boys wouldn't be capable of doing what had to be done. Furthermore, what they were about to do was dangerous. Thorin knew.

“So, I'll see you tonight?” Fili asked.

“See you tonight,” Thorin confirmed. Then he hung up, feeling guilty.

When he and the others had attacked Azog because of what that bastard had done to Dis and the boys for years, he hadn't imagined that Azog's son would also take revenge someday. He hadn't even imagined that Bolg knew who was behind the attack on Azog, knowing that Azog had several dubious contacts due to gambling debts.

However, Bolg seemed to have found it out and that was the reason for Tauriel's suffering. And Kili's. Thorin knew how hard it must have been on his nephew to know what his bride-to-be had to go through. Then thinking about the fact that the bastard who had certainly abused Kili as a child had also raped Kili's fiancée later... That was too much to bear.

If they only hadn't been too soft to deal with Bolg as well then. It wasn't as if Azog's son had been an innocent youth. He had regularly beaten up Fili and also tormented Kili, yet, when Dis had objected, Azog had punished her as he had done with the lads when they did something wrong. Of course, Dis hadn't told her brothers about it, not even when she had ended up in hospital. Only when Azog had beaten up Fili so badly (after he had tried to defend his mother) that the boy had had a concussion and three cracked rips, she had confided in her brothers and left that asshole for good.

That was when the Durinson-Clan came together and decided what had to be done. They came to the conclusion that Azog needed to be punished as he had punished Dis and the lads. And then they took their revenge.

This time, it would be the same.

Thorin stood up and left his room in order to prepare everything for tonight's meeting.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are very much appreciated!


	11. Meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Durinsons meet and learn about what has happened to Tauriel... and Kíli.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again to my beta, GrammarGrrrl.  
> Trigger warning: Implied/referenced child abuse, rape and violence. Read at your own discretion.

When the Durinson-Clan met at eight o'clock in the evening, Thorin was surprised to see some faces in the crowd he hadn't expected to see, like Gimli and his blond boyfriend, or Tauriel's parents.

Frowning, Thorin turned towards Fili.

The young man just shrugged. "I'm sorry, uncle, I couldn't prevent them from attending this meeting after... after they had watched the video." He gulped visibly, but bravely met his uncle's gaze.

Thorin drew his eyebrows together.

"And what about you, Fili? Did you watch the video?"

Guiltily, Fili lowered his gaze. "I-I didn't want to, Thorin, but... but Legolas accidentally opened the file and... and watched it, crying blue murder, catching Gimli's attention and... and mine. So, involuntarily, we- Gimli and I- watched it, too. But... but I prevented Kili from watching it, that's good, isn't it?" he rambled and Thorin took pity on his oldest nephew. 

He smiled at the young man, putting his hand on the other's shoulder. "I'm not angry with you, lad", he appeased his nephew, then he asked, "But why are  _her_ parents here?"

In response, Fili gave him a sad smile. "That... that bastard sent them the video too!"

Thorin closed his eyes, feeling very uncomfortable now. No parent should ever see how their daughter was violated!

So, his gaze briefly wandered towards the blond and beautiful couple, clasping hands, wearing designer jeans and expensive leather jackets as if trying to fit in with the crowd, but failing miserably since nobody else here wore such exquisite clothes.

For a moment, Thorin locked eyes with them, seeing Thranduil's grim and Galadriel's feral expression, nodding to them in acknowledgement and they nodded back.

Then he decided it was time to start the meeting.

"Friends and family, thank you all for coming tonight on such short notice! I'm not sure how much you already know about the reasons for our gathering but I can tell you it is because a crime was committed against a member of my family: Tauriel Silvan, my younger nephew's fiancée, has been raped, tortured and then left to die in front of her own house!" Thorin paused, letting his gaze wander over the crowd.

There was general murmuring and several people let out scandalized gasps.

"Do you know who it was, Thorin?" Gloin, a distant cousin and Gimli's father, wanted to know.

Thorin exchanged a glance with Fili, then he took a deep breath and turned towards his cousin.

"Yes, we know. It was Bolg Butcher, Azog Butcher's son!"

Again, there was general murmuring, but this time a few angry shouts could be heard as well. Then, Galadriel stood up.

"I'm Galadriel, Tauriel's mother. Today, when I visited my daughter in the hospital, I promised her that I would take revenge on whoever did this to my little girl. And then, after watching the... the footage of... of my daughter's violation, after hearing her screaming and crying and pleading while this... this monster seemed to enjoy himself, laughing and grunting... I decided that it needed to be a very slow, a very painful death." 

She paused, looking at the others in the room, briefly locking eyes with Dis, who gave her a small nod.

"So when our son, Legolas, called and told us to delete the video without watching, it was already too late, those pictures, they are forever burned into my and my husband's brains. Yet Legolas also informed us about the way this family deals with such monsters... And I'm glad that Fili Durinson gave us permission to attend this meeting, to be able to take part in the planning of taking revenge!"

Galadriel looked again at the others in the room, smiling slightly at Fili then she sat down.

Thorin cleared his throat. This woman was certainly nobody one would want to mess with and it surprised him. He had always considered Tauriel's family as being very cool and composed. But maybe that was only how they presented themselves to the outside world.

They were rich and famous, after all, and those people always wore a mask when in public.

However, Thorin felt that now was the right time to reveal a few more secrets. So, he cleared his throat in order to catch the others' attention.

"Friends and family, as gruesome as this crime is, there is also another reason why we need to take revenge. As you all know, for a while, my sister, Dis, was involved with Azog Butcher, even lived together with him, her sons and Azog's son, Bolg and you all know that Azog abused not only her but also the lads, all three of them - his own son and my nephews." 

He paused for a moment, looking around the room, locking eyes with his sister who appeared to start crying any moment, but what Thorin was about to say next needed to be said.

"However, Bolg was far from just being a victim of his father's outbursts. He also took an active part in the abuse of my nephews. He beat up Fili on a regular basis and... and I suspect that he... that Bolg sexually assaulted Kili when he was only five years old."

Now, the Durinson-Clan was really shocked.

"Is there any proof for your assumptions, Thorin?" another distant cousin, Balin, finally asked.

Thorin cleared his throat.

"Well, I remember an incident that Fili told me about. He was only ten, then, and couldn't really explain what he had been witnessing. And I just dismissed it, thinking that he must have interpreted the situation the wrong way because I refused to believe it," Thorin admitted.

Now it was Fili who cleared his throat. "It's true what my uncle says. I was ten years old and came home from school earlier. Bolg was in Kili's and my room, holding a naked and crying Kili on his lap. I will never forget... never... how Kili reached out his thin arms towards me, looking pleadingly at me. But when I went over to them, Bolg just shoved Kili onto the floor, slapped me several times causing my nose to bleed, saying that I should mind my own business, then pushed me out of the door, locking it."

Fili took a deep breath, wiping away his tears (and he didn't care about the fact that he was openly crying in front of his family and friends) before continuing.

"I could still hear Kili crying, I could hear Bolg shouting at him and hitting him, while I was banging against the door, demanding that Bolg should open it - which he didn't. At some point, I had to go to the bathroom to tend to my heavily bleeding nose. When I came back, the door to our room was open, Bolg was gone and Kili was sitting on the floor, fully dressed, knees drawn towards his chest, his arms wrapped around his legs, rocking back and forth. He wouldn't talk to me nor look at me for the rest of the afternoon. But later, when we got undressed to bathe, I-I... I noticed something in... in his underwear. There was blood! And... and Kili wouldn't let me help him with washing himself - which was really unusual, I always helped him with washing..."

Fili's voice broke and in an instant, Thorin was at his nephew's side, taking the young man into his arms, comforting him, finally offering the support he should have offered all those years ago.

"What are we waiting for, then? Let's find this monster and show him what it means to harm someone from the Durinson-Clan!" Nori declared, jumping up from his seat.

"Hell, yes! This is something we should have done fifteen years ago when we dealt with Azog! We should have taught that scum's son a lesson as well!" Dwalin agreed.

Thorin tried to lock eyes with as many members of his clan members as possible, while still holding a crying Fili.

"Yes, I agree, that we should have. Especially since Bolg claimed that he raped and tortured Kili's fiancée as revenge for us going after his father and he also threatened to kill Fili and Kili."

Now several members of the Durinson-Clan jumped up from their seats, looking as if they were ready to rip Bolg into pieces if they happened to meet him.

_Good_ , Thorin thought.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since I have a lot going on in RL, updates will take place irregularly.  
> Please, bear with me!


	12. Evidence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fíli and Kíli bring some evidence to Olivia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to thank my beta, GrammarGrrrl.

It was half past seven in the morning when two young men, one blond with a beard and the other brunet with some stubble, both with shoulder-length curly hair, showed up at the police station, carrying a plastic bag with some fashion store's logo on it.

"Excuse me, can we talk to Lieutenant Olivia Benson, please?", the blond one asked a young police officer who was passing them by.

The young woman just raised an eyebrow at them.

"Lieutenant Benson is very busy, so may I ask why? Maybe someone else can help you as well?"

The two young men exchanged a look.

"Well, it's about some evidence in a... a rape case", the blond young man explained, lowering his gaze, while the brunet young man bit his lower lip.

The young police officer thought she understood, "Oh, I'm sorry. Of  course, I will lead you to her... May I ask for your names?"

The young men looked at each other again.

"I'm Fili Durinson, this is my younger brother, Kili Durinson", the blond answered.

The young police officer nodded, "Alright,  Mr. Durinson and  Mr. Durinson, I'm Detective Lisa Miller, I'll show you to Lieutenant Benson's office, please follow me,” she said and the brothers did just that.

Once they were standing in front of the glass door, Detective Miller told them to wait outside, while she went in and quietly talked to Olivia Benson. Then she came out again, smiling compassionately at the Durinson brothers.

"You can go in now", she simply said and went away.

Fili and Kili looked at each other again, then they took a deep breath and entered Olivia Benson's office.

The tall and attractive Lieutenant smiled at them, " Mr. Durinson and  Mr. Durinson, what can I do for you? My detective just told me that you've got some evidence in a rape case... May I assume it is the case about the abduction and sexual assault of Tauriel Silvan?" Olivia could see how the brothers flinched. 

Then the older one cleared his throat. "Yes, it is. Yesterday we were sent a box with... with some... some strange content,” Fili explained and put the plastic bag on Olivia's desk.

She raised an eyebrow.

"What do you mean with 'strange content'?" she demanded to know, opening a drawer of her desk, taking out a pair of latex gloves.

"Well, it's Tauriel's underwear, the underwear she wore the day that she didn't come home... smeared with stuff... and toys from Kili's and my childhood", Fili explained.

While Olivia put on the latex gloves she looked directly at Fili, "How do you know that it is  Ms. Silvan's underwear?" she asked, reaching for the plastic bag.

"Well, it looks like that kind of underwear she would usually wear - pastel colours and lace - I'm doing the laundry at home, so I should know, shouldn't I?" Fili answered and Olivia didn't miss the slightly hostile tone in his voice, suddenly remembering Amanda's suspicions about the boys being somehow involved.

"I'm sorry,  Mr. Durinson, I'm not implying anything, it's just routine because we have to be sure..."

Saying that, she opened the plastic bag, taking out a shoe box, placing it on her desk, then carefully lifting the lid. She immediately noticed the tale-tell smell of urine, semen, and blood on something that looked like light blue and yellow lace. When she took it out, she could see that those were the remains of a lace slip and a push-up bra.

"I'll send this to our lab to take some DNA samples. You said you touched this,  Mr. Durinson?" she asked Fili.

The blond young man nodded.

"Yes, I did. I know I shouldn't have... I don't know why I did it..." he rambled, but Olivia interrupted him.

"It's okay. You have experienced some traumatic events, so maybe you weren't thinking straight. Anyway, we were about to take DNA samples from your brother, yourself, your cousin, and Ms. Silvan's stepbrother to be able to distinguish your DNA from the offenders... That means we can also distinguish your DNA on this piece of evidence,” she told the brothers. Then she noticed the rest of the box contents. There was a toy car, a plush  teddy, and a letter. Olivia frowned.

"Are those the toys you told me about?" She asked while taking the rest of the content out of the box.

Fili nodded, "Yes. The car was mine, our late father gave it to me, and the teddy was Kili's. We never saw it again after our mother left her ex-boyfriend and took us with her in a moonlight flight,” Fili revealed. “He was very abusive..." 

Olivia's eyes widened in shock.

"So, there might be a personal connection between you and this case?" she asked.

The brothers exchanged a glance. "Yes, that's what we suspected when we got the box", Fili answered.

Olivia nodded, "Did you read the letter?" She wanted to know from the brothers.

Fili nodded, "I did. But I wouldn't let my baby brother read it. It's too... it's... It's too..." he didn't finish the sentence and just shook his head, tears in his eyes.

Olivia tried to smile soothingly. "It's okay. Why don't you and your brother go grab a coffee while I have a look at it, maybe together with one or two of my detectives? I'm sure Detective Carisi will be glad to get you a decent cup of coffee, just go ask for him. We can talk later", she suggested.

Fili  sniffled but nodded.

"Yeah, fine, that's a great idea, come, Kili... And thank you, Lieutenant Benson", he said, while grabbing his brother’s wrist, leading him out of Olivia's office.

The Lieutenant had to take a deep breath. It seemed that Fin's gut feeling had been right. This case was bigger than they had thought. So, Olivia called for him and for Amanda. When the two detectives arrived at her office, she filled them in on what Fili Durinson had just told her.

"And you haven't read the letter by now? Waiting for us?" Fin asked incredulously.

Olivia nodded, "Yes, because I think whatever this letter contains, it's crucial for the case", she answered, while enfolding the piece of paper, putting it on her desk so that her two colleagues could read it together with her.

The letter was revealing, though.

It was practically a confession. The offender admitted to having abducted, raped and tortured Tauriel Silvan together with two friends as an act of revenge for the brothers' uncle being somehow involved in harming the offender's father.

Furthermore, the letter contained some obscene descriptions, not only of the rape of Tauriel  Silvan but also of what the offender had done to the victim's  fiancé when he had been just a child of five.

"Oh, my god", Amanda whispered, putting a hand to her mouth, while Fin just balled his fists.

"Do you think it's true, Olivia? That the boy was also abused by... by this monster?" he asked.

Olivia just shrugged.

"I don't know. Let's just ask the brothers", she simply suggested.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, what do you think?  
> Comments are very much appreciated!


	13. Questions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The SVU has some questions for Kíli...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks go to my beta GrammarGrrrl.

Carisi watched Fíli and Kíli Durinson while he handed them each a plastic cup with lukewarm coffee and guided them over to a quiet corner, slightly annoyed by the fact that he had to act as a kind of "babysitter" while Olivia was sharing important details of the Silvan case with Fin and Amanda.

Then, as he observed the interaction between the brothers, the way the older one seemed to look out for the younger one while the younger brother appeared to be dependent on his big brother, he thought that maybe he would be able to contribute important information to the case as well.

"So, I understand that you and your brother just delivered some important evidence concerning the case of your fiancé, Mr. Durinson", he addressed Kíli.

The brunet glanced sideways at his brother, then nodded.

"Yes," he simply said. His brother remained silent.

 _Great, they are really talkative_ , Carisi thought.

For a while, they sipped their coffee in silence. Then Carisi received a text message from Olivia.

 _"We need to question Kíli Durinson about the sexual abuse he had suffered at the hands of Bolg Butcher when he was five years old. Do you think you can prepare him for this?"_ the message read.

Carisi cursed silently.

Of course, as soon as the case turned difficult he had to deal with it!

So, Carisi cleared his throat.

"Mr. Durinson, what can you tell me about Bolg Butcher?" he asked.

The reaction was tale-telling.

The older brother, the blond one, drew his eyebrows together and scowled at Carisi. The younger brother, however- the brunet one- pressed his plastic coffee cup a little bit too hard so that the warm liquid spilled over the rim and onto his hand, still clutching the cup.

"Kíli!" the older brother immediately scolded.

"I-I'm sorry," the younger one mumbled apologetically.

Carisi just smiled.

"It's okay, those cups are not very stable," he said, handing the brunet some paper towels.

After the younger Durinson brother had cleaned up the mess he had made, Carisi addressed him again.

"So, Mr. Durinson, what can you tell me about Bolg Butcher?" he asked again.

This time, Kíli, as the younger one was called, exchanged a glance with his brother.

"He... he used to live with us," he finally answered timidly.

Carisi raised an eyebrow.

"Why?" he wanted to know.

The brothers exchanged another glance.

"Because he... he was the son of our mother's boyfriend at that time," the blond one, Fíli, answered.

Carisi nodded.

"And can you tell me a little bit more about your relationship with him?" he inquired.

Now, Kíli Durinson was almost hyperventilating, looking pleadingly at his brother, who extended a hand, placing it over his brother's lying on the table.

"Bolg was really bad," Kíli finally answered.

Carisi focused his attention on him. "Why?" he asked.

The brothers exchanged another look. "Because he hurt us - hurt me," Kíli finally said with a grave voice, his eyes downcast.

"How?" Carisi wanted to know.

The brothers remained silent for a while, looking at each other as if they were communicating without words. Carisi considered repeating his question when he noticed that Kíli was silently crying, tears rolling down his cheeks. Then the young man turned his face towards Carisi, wiping away his tears.

"He raped me when I was little," Kíli finally answered.

Carisi nodded.

"I'm sorry about that, but we need to ask you some questions about it... Do you feel ready for this?" he inquired.

Kíli exchanged another look with his brother.

"Can Fíli stay with me during the interview?" he asked, grabbing his brother's hand, squeezing it so hard that his knuckles turned white.

Carisi nodded. "I'm sure that isn't a problem," he told the brunet.

Kíli swallowed, then he exchanged a glance with Fíli, before answering, "If Fíli stays with me, I'll do it."

Carisi let out a sigh of relief. "That's great, Mr. Durinson. Please wait a sec, I'll just inform Lieutenant Benson about this... development. Please, help yourself to some more coffee, if you like, or have some cookies," he said enthusiastically, pointing towards the table on the other side of the room on which the coffee maker and several plastic cups, as well as a plate with some stale cookies, stood.

While walking over to Olivia's office, Carisi felt confident. It was his doing that Kíli Durinson agreed on answering some questions about his abuse as a child. Carisi knew that he wasn't as intimidating as Fin, as fierce as Amanda, or as experienced as Olivia, but sometimes that was an advantage. Like today. Carisi was convinced that it was due to his non-threatening demeanour that the younger Durinson brother complied.

So, with lifted spirits, Carisi knocked at Olivia's door, waiting for her calling "Enter, please", then doing exactly that.

They were all assembled around Olivia's desk, looking up at him expectantly.

"Well?" Olivia asked.

Carisi smiled. "Kíli Durinson agreed to be interviewed, but only if his brother can stay with him," he explained.

Amanda frowned and exchanged a glance with Fin, but Olivia was okay with that condition and so she sent him back to get Kíli and his brother. Carisi complied.

After leading the Durinsons into Olivia's office, the brothers looked suspiciously at the three detectives and their lieutenant.

"Are you all going to stay here while... while I answer your questions?", Kíli asked timidly.

Olivia gave him a warm and reassuring smile. "Of course not. Only two of us will be here, but we will record your statement. Is that okay with you, Mr. Durinson?"

Kíli nodded slightly. "Yeah, it's okay, If Fili stays, it will be okay," he mumbled, still clinging to his brother's hand.

Olivia's smile widened. "Good. Please, sit down, then. Do you have any preferences about who should be leading the interview?" she wanted to know.

Kíli cleared his throat. "I- I'd like you to do it... together with him," he told Olivia, pointing to Carisi and Olivia nodded. "Fine. Detectives Rollins and Tutuola, please leave for now," she instructed her detectives and they obeyed. Then she again turned towards Kíli and Fíli. "Please make yourself comfortable. Do you want something to drink?" she asked while opening her desk drawer, taking out a recording device, placing it on her desk.

Kíli merely shook his head, but Fíli answered, "No, we're fine. We just had some coffee."

Olivia nodded, "Good. Let's start then."

Carisi took that as a hint to take his seat next to Olivia, facing the brothers. Then they followed protocol, providing the date and time as well as the names of the people present for the record. Then Olivia started with the interview, asking who Bolg Butcher was, what happened when Kíli was five, like the questions Carisi had already asked the brunet, but this time they were more detailed. Carisi could see that Kíli was struggling with some of the answers and only seemed to calm down when he looked at his brother. Then, to everyone's surprise, he added, "Maybe you can also ask Fíli. He witnessed some of it. And since he is five years older than me, he could certainly remember everything better."

Olivia raised her eyebrows in surprise, turning towards Fíli Durinson. "Is this true, Mr. Durinson? Have you witnessed your brother's abuse as a child?" she inquired.

Meanwhile, the blond had turned pale, pressing his free hand over his mouth, nodding slightly. "Yes," he whispered silently.

"Please tell us about it," Olivia requested.

Fíli cleared his throat and told Olivia and Carisi how he had walked in on Bolg "touching" his little brother in an inappropriate way while Kíli had been crying, beating Fíli up for this disturbance, throwing him out of the room, then he told them about Kíli's frightened behaviour afterwards, the blood stains.

"I didn't know what to do. I was only ten! So, I told Uncle. But he didn't believe me, didn't help us, saying that I must have misinterpreted everything - and that was that," he whispered.

"Yes, I was scared! What Bolg did to me - it hurt so much! But... but he threatened that he would kill Fíli if I ever told anyone what he did to me, so I kept quiet - until now!" Kíli added.

Carisi and Olivia exchanged a look. Yes, this case was bigger than they had initially thought.

"Mr. Durinson and Mr. Durinson, do you have any idea why Bolg Butcher would now, after all these years, take revenge on you? Especially since you two claim that you never told anyone about the abuse or that nothing had ever been done about it?" Olivia pressed.

The brothers simply looked at each other and remained silent.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's been a while since the last update, but I hope you are still interested in this fic.  
> Please let me know what you think!

**Author's Note:**

> Shall I continue writing this?


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